My Imaginary Brother
by dollstei
Summary: When Alfred was cleaning his closet, he not only found his revolutionary war stuff, he found a diary. In it was him and his life before all the bad things happened that tore the people he loved away. Now, America has to relive a terrible part of his past again as he reads through his diary.


One day I was rummaging through my old closet again. I had to wait after I found all that Revolutionary War stuff for me to calm down. As I was going through a little chest, I found a diary. Oh, this brought so many memories back; Happy and sad. I opened it up and started to read. I stopped at one entry and my eyes struck with pain. I remembered this. I still do.

It all started when Matthew asked Arthur to make him "invisible". He didn't want people to notice that he didn't age; that he stayed the same throughout the years and he still will for years to come. I still remember it like it was yesterday...

* * *

It was five in the afternoon, and Matthew had just walked in the door. No one knew where he was exactly, he just was gone for the day. No one questioned it as it was normal for everyone to just leave and come back here and there without explanation.

Matthew walked in the door, he looked upset. I especially could tell. I can always see him and whether or not he's happy. This looked like one of those times he needed someone, and I was always there for him.

I went to walk up to him when I noticed he wasn't acknowledging me. Instead he turned and walked straight to Arthur. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but I could see Arthur's facial expressions. It didn't look good. He looked terrified and his hand movements looked as though he was denying something. It was awhile before Arthur gave in and shook his head yes. I surely didn't know what it was but I wanted to know.

I crept up the hallway as I followed them and hid in Francis and Arthur's room. I was now able to hear them faintly.

"I don't really want to do this," Arthur said.

"I'm not asking much, I just want to not be noticed so much," Matt replied.

"But that will mean that we won't notice you."

"I mean I just want to blend in more to the outside crowd. They'll see me but they won't think much of me. But of course you guys will know me so that's different, eh?"

"Yea, alright. I'll do my best so that you can blend in."

"Alright, thanks," Matt said happily.

I didn't think much of it. It sounded like a good deal; people not noticing my "ageing".

They both went into Arthur's secret room. I couldn't enter as they locked the door. I always wanted to see Arthur use his magic.

Light appeared beneath the door crack and a whooshing sound came from inside. I guess this is the closest I would get to seeing his magic, I thought. I walked back down the hallway and entered the kitchen to open the fridge.

It was about four hours later and I never even realised the time. It was almost time for bed, so I cleaned up my mess and walked into my room. Something was different this time. It was more quiet than usual. I walked back into the hallway and looked it over. Francis and Arthur's room was open and empty, and so was Mattie's room. The only room that was filled was Arthur's secret room. There was no light emanating from the door, only a muffled sound. A sound of despair. A sound of weeping.

I walked slowly to the door and the weeping got a little louder. I stood for a moment before I knocked. There was no answer. I knocked again. No answer. This time I opened the door and saw Arthur kneeling on the floor sobbing. Matt was next to him comforting him, but it didn't seem to do anything. Matt looked up and saw me, he smiled faintly, got up, and left the room. I turned to Arthur and Arthur looked up and saw me. He immediately tried to act normal. I could see he was trying to yell at me for being in his secret room without permission but he just couldn't make a sound. I walked over to him and put my hand on his shoulder.

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

He still couldn't make a sound. This time he looked like he was confused. There were so many emotions is his face that it was hard to read. I put both my hands on his shoulders now.

"Hey, Arthur, look at me," I consulted him. "You okay? What's the matter? What happened?"

He stared at me in confusion and finally said, "I-I d-don't know. E-Everything's fine, I-I d-don't know w-w-why I'm c-crying."

Arthur is acting really weird but it might just be his time of the month, I thought. I put my arm around him and helped him to his room. This time Francis was home and so we helped Arthur to bed.

It took me too long to really understand what was going on here. It was months before I came to the conclusion of what really happened.

Months flew by and Matt and I were hanging as usual. It had been different ever since that night I saw Arthur break down for no reason. They would notice Matt but every once and a while it was as though he seemed invisible to everyone else but me. I would turn to Matt and he would just sit there and smile like he always used to. I assumed it was nothing.

Matt and I talked, except I did most of the talking now. When we played together, it was different from last time. He would usually just stay still and quiet. I just thought he was more peaceful and mature now. When it was dinner time, usually everyone would acknowledge he's there and we'd all start to eat, but when I went to talk to him, both Arthur and Francis looked at me like I was crazy.

It got to the point where I couldn't bear it. I got up one morning and heard Arthur and Francis talking in their bedroom. They said something about how I must have an imaginary friend. I broke down and went into Matt's room and woke him up. I started to cry and he comforted me. He tried to assure me that it was not what I thought it was, but I never believed it.

Of course, most of the time that they did acknowledge Mattie, I'd see Arthur go back into his secret room. When I followed behind to stand outside the door, I would usually here some weird language and then sobbing. Then it was like ignoring Mattie after that. I didn't know what to think. I had to find out, so I invited Mattie out for lunch. Mattie agreed and we went to a nice little cafe. When we got there I could tell something was up. This is where I started to get suspicious and more aware of what was happening.

As we were talking I noticed that almost everybody in the cafe was looking at me weirdly. I looked over to Matthew but he was just sitting there smiling. It eventually got to the point where we didn't even talk anymore, so we payed for our drinks and headed on out.

As the weeks went on and on and on, I eventually got to the point where I didn't talk to Matt. I certainly didn't get weird looks from anybody then. I wondered why this was, until it hit me like a wall of bricks: the spell went wrong.

I froze, unable to breathe. Of course! It made sense now, why Arthur was upset for no reason and why they didn't acknowledge Mattie. I felt sick to my stomach. I wanted to talk with Arthur but there wasn't actually a good time to bring it up. I eventually tried to talk to Mattie about it.

"Hey, you wanna talk?" I asked quietly.

"Sure," he replied.

"So, what happened a few months ago? When you got home and went to Arthur instead of me?"

He kinda sat there for a moment before speaking.

"Nothing happened, just my day got better." That wasn't the answer I wanted.

"No, what really happened?"

"Nothing happened." Not the right answer.

I eventually gave up as I asked him about twenty more times. I always got the same answer, "Nothing happened" but I really knew what did happen, and it hurt me.

As the months went on I eventually stopped even realising he was there, just like everyone else. I kept getting talked to about my "Imaginary friend" and that I need to let him go, that I'm too old for that kid stuff. I kept getting weird looks whenever to tried to acknowledge Matt. I eventually pretended he was invisible, that he wasn't even there, that I couldn't see him.

I knew that no one could see him, and when they did (which was more often than expected) Arthur just became sad again. I never did get to talk to Arthur, nor was I now talking to Matt. I shut him out of my life and no matter how much it hurts, I'm never able to actually converse with him if any. It hurt so bad to even look at him now. I got to the point to where I was used to not seeing him, because the moment I would see him is the moment I would break again.

* * *

I sat there and cried. It has been years and years since this happened. I haven't had an actual conversation with Mattie in years, let alone I actually acknowledged him in front of people. Sometimes I do, sometimes everyone does; which I think is the worst part. I think it hurts more to acknowledge him then not the next day.

_There's a world meeting tomorrow. I need to suck it up_. I put the diary down and stood up.

_Wow, way to get much of the closet done today, Alfred_, I thought. I left the closet to go get ready for bed, there was a busy day tomorrow.

* * *

The world meeting had already started and like always Eyebrows and Frog-Face started to fight again, whether over who hit on who or who called who a "wanker" or "the black sheep of Europe". I tried to keep them under control but that didn't seem to work as England and I ended up fight again. Of course, then there was Germany who kept yelling at everyone to stop fighting as well, but as usual that didn't work either. It was a big whopping mess.

Eventually Germany got up and left, he was always the first to leave, with Italy right behind him. Then Russia and China and Japan all left, and that created a chain of everybody leaving. Of course we weren't able to have a conversation go right anymore.

"I'm the hero so I'll take care of everything," I mumbled. I was the only one left in the room, or so I thought. Out of the corner of the room I heard a faint voice.

"I don't mean to complain, but another day, another meeting gone as usual. Nothing got accomplished."

I looked up to see Mattie sitting there smiling. I faintly smiled to stop the tears.

"I know," I said. This must've startled him because he jumped a little and looked at me.

"You're still in the room? You see me?" he asked me. I looked at him in surprise.

"Of course I see you, Mattie, we're brothers. I will always see you."


End file.
